Coming to Terms with My Life

By Dwight Roth/Roth Poetry

These five stages of grief are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross ~

Acceptance turns to nostalgia

as I turn 75 tomorrow

Another year added to a long

interesting life

There is a sense of grief at this age

looking back and looking forward

Grief for the loss of what once was

realizing change is inevitable

Watching the next generation

moving on without you

Knowing someday, they too

will look back wishing

they had asked more questions

of the living

The future is a bit unsettling as

control may be forfeited

to someone else’s care

I pray that will not happen

I have wrestled with God

Argued with him threatened him

and been angry with him

At this point in life I have made

my peace with God and eternity

Some things are better left unknown

The subtle losses seem to hurt the most

There is anger at the changes that

occur in our physical bodies

The ringing in the ears, the loss of hearing

All that extra weight that comes on slowly

The medical field has no sensitivity

to body shaming, calling me obese

How is that any different than saying

you’re fat

Yet I am thankful I can still function

slower and with less energy but still going

Joints and muscles ache more at this age

but still remain relatively strong

My life’s work has been traded for

a more sedentary style of living

I look back and dream of what once was

Knowing memories are all we have

I listen to the old songs and relish

the pleasure of visions they hold

But joy comes in the grandchildren

so full of life and possibilities

I pray that they will find the strength

to face the realities of a changing world

and still show love and compassion

for those around them

It has been a long life and this, a long poem

So I think it is best to stop here.

This poem is the result of a challenge to consider the five stages of grief and choose one to write a poem. Since it was his 75th birthday he chose to write about acceptance. “I have kicked and screamed, so to speak, throughout my life. I still grumble and complain about the changes taking place, but for the most part I feel like I have made my peace with my life and am in a place of acceptance. Letting go is very difficult, but in reality we never really have control in this life.” – Dwight L. Roth

Dwight Roth grew up in Southwestern Pennsylvania. He taught elementary school in Eastern North Carolina before retiring after 29 years. Now he lives with his wife Ruth, near Monroe, NC, and spends his time painting and writing. He has self-published several books that are found on Amazon Kindle. He is also published in past Old Mountain Press Anthologies. A book of poems called Ebb and Flow and a children’s book on Alzheimer’s called Grandpa Has Holes in His Head are his latest creations. Ebb and Flow is only available in hard copy from the author at dwru27@aol.com

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