Matthew 5:43-48 , “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

If it’s truly your desire to be like Jesus, this is what it will take.   I want to encourage you today by sharing with you three real-world ways to love your enemies. Before we look at the real-world ways to love your enemies, I want to share two major points first because without these it will never happen.

1. Loving your enemies starts on the Inside

Before you can show any outward display of loving your enemies there must first be an inward transformation. In other words, if you can’t love someone who is against you, the problem is because of what is inside you. The other person is not the problem.

For many years, I struggled to forgive my father. The problem wasn’t him, the problem was inside me. I know that is a tough pill to swallow but it is a necessary one if we’re ever going to really, truly love our enemies.

When you reflect on Jesus’ life and character, he demonstrated how much he loved those who were against him. Remember when he was on the cross, he said:

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”  Luke 23:34

This can only flow from a heart that has been transformed by the love of God and the power of the Holy Spirit. Just so you know, it’s not just something that Jesus did—you can do it, too. Let me remind you of Stephen. Here is how the Bible described him:

Now Stephen, a man full of God’s grace and power, performed great wonders and signs among the people. Acts 6:8

If you are familiar with his story, eventually he was stoned to death for preaching the truth to the Sanhedrin. You can read the whole story in Acts 7. I need to focus your attention on the end of the story (sorry for the spoiler alert if you never read it):

While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” Then he fell on his knees and cried out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he fell asleep.  Acts 7:59-60

Why was Stephen able to do this? Because he was a man full of the Holy Spirit. His life had been transformed on the inside. If there ever was a real-world way to love your enemies on display, this was it. The good news is, if Stephen could do it, so can you. He is no different than any of us.

2. Be First to Forgive

The second major principle can only happen after God has changed your heart. Once he has done that this becomes a little easier. Here it is…be first. What does that mean? Be the first to offer forgiveness, before someone even asks for it.

Be the first to show love, even when you feel like they don’t deserve it. Be first to show kindness even if the person is not very nice. Why do you need to do this? Because this is what Jesus did and by doing this you truly reflect his character. Consider his words:

If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? – Matthew 5:46-47

The reality is that when you display this type of love to your enemies, you are showing them Jesus. You are showing that you are different from the world. And that, my friends, is what being salt and light are all about.

Let’s now look at three real-world ways to love your enemies.

1. Forgive Those Who Have Hurt You

This is spiritual and practical. Forgive if you have been hurt by anyone. If someone has spoken ill against you. If someone has done anything to bring harm to your character, your family, or you…then you must forgive them.

Forgiveness is not for that person; it is for you. Loving and forgiving your enemies actually frees you.

2. Flip the Script and Respond with Kindness.

Honestly, there are some people who just won’t be very nice or kind to you. When you come in contact with these people and they show you hate, you respond with love and kindness. A good rule of thumb is to just follow what the Bible says:

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. Romans 12:17

On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:20-21

3. Pray for Those Who Persecute You

You never know, if they don’t know Jesus, your kindness may win them over. It could also mean they will never reciprocate or respond, but you can’t control that. But don’t worry—God will eventually deal with them. Just do your part:

 Isaac Otieno was born to a schoolteacher and a peasant mother. Once he finished school he found steady jobs to be scarce in Kenya. After several years of unsteady work, he became depressed and developed a habit of drinking. By the grace of God he rededicated his life to Christ. While attending church he discovered that God had made him for a purpose. He was called to begin the ETERNAL FATHERHOOD CENTER in 2006. Isaac is married to God-given, Purity Jackline Otieno and has two grown daughters.