DISAGREEMENT WITHOUT DISGRUNTLEMENT

By Doug Pierce

“And the  contention was so sharp between  them, that they departed asunder one from the other: and so Barnabas took  Mark, and sailed unto Cyprus; And  Paul chose Silas, and departed, being  recommended by the brethren unto the grace of God.” Acts 15:39-40

DISAGREEMENT WITHOUT DISGRUNTLEMENT. 

Paul and Barnabas were great friends and ministry partners. Barnabas had befriended Paul when Paul was just a young Christian. They were specifically paired by the Holy Spirit for the first missionary journey, a difficult but rewarding journey of reaching the lost and starting new churches. 

When the time came for a second missionary journey, a problem arose. Barnabas (the son of encouragement) wanted to include his nephew, John Mark. Paul adamantly said no to that suggestion. Why? They had taken John Mark on the first trip, and he bailed out when the going got tough. Paul had no desire to experience that again. He was not about to head out on a second mission trip with a proven quitter. “Fool me twice, shame on me.” 

Barnabas, on the other hand, saw great potential in his nephew, and he wanted to love and encourage John Mark and give him a second chance. Since neither man would budge on his convictions regarding what to do with John Mark, these great, godly friends were forced to part ways.

Isn’t it interesting that two men like Paul and Barnabas had such a serious disagreement that they could no longer work together? I’ve often asked myself why is this story even in the Bible? Could it be to show us that it is not uncommon for good and godly people to disagree?

DISAGREEMENTS IN THE CHRISTIAN LIFE. 

What can we learn from this situation to help us in our struggles with other Christians?

1. Life and ministry are filled with judgment calls. The situation with John Mark was not an issue of sin or immorality. There was no specific Scripture verse that said they should take him or should not take him. It was a judgment call … and Barnabas and Paul did not see the situation in the same way. Both had a great point to make in their respective arguments. You may be in an argument right now with a fellow Christian. You may think you are 100% right in your opinion. You may be … but he/she may have a good point also.
2. We often struggle to find the proper balance between love and truth. Paul was strong on truth. The truth of the gospel was too important to risk another bail out by a proven quitter. Barnabas was strong on love. The love of Christ was too important to not offer another chance to his nephew. In your life, you will gravitate toward love or truth. We need both.
3. Godly people can disagree without getting bitter and disgruntled. Paul and Barnabas couldn’t work together anymore, but they could still love and support one another. They were not bitter enemies; they were still brothers in the Lord and teammates in the work of the Lord. How about you? When you hit a point of disagreement with your spouse, your friend, a workmate, or pastor, can you agree to disagree and still stay friends? Bitterness is a cancer of the soul. God hates it because it destroys lives and defiles many people (see Hebrews 12:15).
4. If you come to a deadlock with another person, yield to the leader. Who was right in this disagreement? Was it the love of Barnabas that should have prevailed, or was it the truth of Paul? The Bible doesn’t specifically say who was right and who was wrong in the way they viewed the situation. However, the rest of the book of Acts is dedicated to the life of Paul. He was God’s chosen instrument. He was the leader of the mission team. What is the lesson here? If you come to a standstill on a judgment call issue, yield to the leader. If you disagree with your husband or your pastor or your boss on a judgment call issue (not a sin issue), yield to their leadership. God will bless you for yielding to authority.
5. Know that the Lord works all things together for good. The split of Paul and Barnabas produced two mission teams. The Lord’s work did not suffer, it thrived. And what about John Mark? Paul had a change of heart about him. The Bible tells us he later became a useful servant to Paul (2 Timothy 4:11). God used him to write the Gospel of Mark. What can we attribute to his great turnaround? Was it the love and encouragement of Barnabas … or the hard nosed rebuke of Paul? I think both were used to help him become a great man of God.

DISAGREEMENTS IN YOUR LIFE.

You and I will certainly face judgment call disagreements in life, ministry, marriage and family. That is just a given. Ask God to help you see the situation from the other person’s perspective. Ask God to help you develop a healthy balance between love and truth. Never let your heart get bitter. Godly people can disagree without becoming disgruntled.

 Perhaps you have had a falling out with someone over a judgment call issue. Perhaps you left a job, a ministry, or a church poorly. Perhaps you are bitter and resentful. Confess it to God and get it out of your heart. Pick up the phone, humble your heart, and right the wrong with the other person. You will be so glad you did… and God will be glorified. 

Think it over . . .

Doug Pierce is a Church planter and a pastor. In 2003 he started, and continues to pastor First Independent Methodist Church in Madison, Mississippi. His #1 priority is to glorify God in all aspects of ministry. He does this through teaching his congregation to Love God, Love One Another, and Love Others to God. Prayer, outreach, and church growth through evangelism are vital parts of his ministry. He and his wife Suzanne live in Madison, Mississippi where they also enjoy their children and grandchildren. To find out more about Doug‘s ministry visit the FIMC Website

Feature Photo by Antoni Shkraba