A Socially Acceptable Grandfather
I don’t know about you, but I am a very social person. I like to talk to people face to face. For many years, I worked in sales around North central Iowa, going from business to business soliciting their business. For 30 years, this was my life, and I really enjoyed it. But when cancer slowed my career, I started to long once again for connections in my own community. I longed to get involved again, and to reacquaint myself with friends who I hadn’t seen much of for years. I live in a small town of 2,500 people, and the only way I could see that would accomplish this was to go to work at the local hardware store.
Boy, was that ever a good choice. Not only have I reconnected with friends I had not seen in a long time, but I have made a lot of new friends. Even possible business contacts. The Growth Alliance in town is a great place to do some volunteer work, and I am now involved with them. This win-win situation has brought me much joy, because I now meet the people right where they are, and am in a position to help them when problems come their way. And I am learning all the time from customers, about how to do certain things. I have learned much about paint, plumbing, Electrical work and gardening. Not just from becoming acquainted with the product, but by talking with the customers. They know what they are doing and can help me learn how to do it. In this environment, it is socially acceptable to build these kinds of friendships. I meet the people right where they are!
Our grandkids are no different. Oh, we see them as different, and sometimes their differences are hard for us to bear. Colored hair, nose rings and piercings all over, tattoos, clothing, music – the list goes on and on. I can look at them and think “What a rebel!” But then I think back to when I was a teenager, and I can’t imagine what my grandfather thought. Long hair, cussing, rock and roll music, gyrating dances. I was a sight to behold as well. When I remember this, I realize that they are not so different after all. I just need to meet them right where they are, not where I am now. I need to meet them at the same place where Jesus met the woman taken in adultery. How did He deal with her? “Neither do I condemn you” were the words He spoke.” An it I said that the woman followed Jesus the rest of her life.
Why? Because He met her where she was and did not judge her. I meet people from my community right where they are – shopping at the local hardware store. We need to meet our grandchildren right where they are. One of many places we can do that is in social media, or in playing games. I am not a game player, but if I was, I certainly would try to play games with my grandchildren. I have no doubt they would beat me badly, but that would be part of the fun. Learning what they love is part of helping us to love them even more. They will have a greater respect for us if they can find something in common with us, so when we learn their games, they grow closer to us. I realize some of those games might be pretty weird, but if we pay attention to them, maybe they will take our advice on some games that are tamer. Who knows how that would affect their thought pattern?
As for social media, most kids today are on Snapchat or TikTok, as well as Facebook. This is a great place to engage them. I tried both for a while but just could not get the hang of it. I asked my granddaughter to help me with TikTok, and she got me started, but I soon lost the ability or the drive to continue. But I stay with Facebook, and we communicate back through Messenger. I would love to get into a pattern of calling them once in a while, and my wife is good at that, but I don’t do it often enough. Social media is a wonderful way to stay connected with the grandkids, and they always like getting messages. Learn how to do this if you don’t already know. It will build your family relationships in a wonderful way.
Peter Gardner, is an author, writer and cancer survivor. He is a vivid writer including his book “The A.S.K. Principal”, written while going through cancer, is a very thorough study on developing a more effective prayer life. A second book, A Stroll with the Psalmist: Uplifting Poetry for Everyday Life is one of poetry. Be sure to check out his website/blog with links to his other websites. At 72, Peter stays busy as a professional insurance agent, an associate in a local hardware store, prep work at a restaurant, and as a cartographer. He and his wife, Janeen live in a small town in Iowa and have been married for 45+ years. They have 3 daughters, 7 grandchildren and are welcoming their first great-grandchild in 2024. His life is full!
Photo by Isaac Quesada on Unsplash
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