Teaching Our Grandchildren to Minister to Pew Widows
By Andy Oldham
Growing up a preacher, and missionaries kid had it ups and downs. But it also taught me to see things from different perspectives. Today I want to discuss those women who sit in the pew by themselves in a worship service. While this magazine is about Grandfathering, we are thankful for the many women readers who enjoy CGM. I believe we, as grandparents, can make a difference in the lives of our grandchildren and that of the widow. This is simply one of many ways we can teach about loving others in such a way that it is tangible. In giving precedence to widows, we should also give thought to the widower.
I understand that in larger congregations there are large groups of seniors who sit together. But for those in smaller fellowships there may be only one, or sometimes two elderly.
Have you ever reflected on the fact that you spend every Service in the company of your family, or friends? Isn’t it wonderful to worship together as family praising God? We support our family unit and enjoy the singing, and praying, and giving thanks as one. How powerful and binding is that as a family. As you grow older, you leave the family to sit with your circle of friends. Here you find a genuine camaraderie of those you know from both school and church, or perhaps work. You enjoy the worship service as one unit of loving young men and women and grow in Christ together.
Can you imagine not having that loving closeness with another person? You are sitting in church all alone? Those who sit by themselves, generally have no one to share the blessings of worship with. Of course, we know, that, God is the father of the fatherless, and a defender of the widows, in His holy habitation. God settles the lonely in families . . . [1]
Has your discernment considered those who worship alone? Have you even noticed? I pray after this short in article you will begin to see those who sit in solitary pews.
Did you know that, “50% of widows leave their church after their husband’s death?
- There are more than 11 million widows nationwide, with over 700,000 new widows every year.
- The majority of widows live close to the poverty line.
- 75% of widows say their church has no organized widow [or senior] program providing intentional care.” [2]
What are we to do about it?
As grandparents we can do a few simple things that will lift their hearts to praise God for your friendship.
- Ask your child or grandchild, to consider in their heart, how they would feel if there was no one to worship with or share that intimate time with God. Wait for their answer.
- Take your child, or grandchild, and introduce yourself to the widow, or perhaps a lonely grandfather. Ask if it would be okay to sit and worship with them. I guarantee you will see a smile. Continue to do this every Sunday. Get to know them and they will look forward to your presence at each fellowship meeting.
- As you get to know them, begin to include them in your family by asking them out for lunch after church.
- Do things that are special for them, that will lift and encourage their spirit at Christmas and other holidays; at any time of the year. Find out their birthday and bring them a card (or send it in the mail) with a small token of your love for them.
- The more you get to know them, the more you are following God’s commandment to take care of them. [3]
- Look at you! You are feeling good about what you are doing, aren’t you? When your desire is to follow God’s plan, he establishes you in His will day after day.
- Start a ministry for widows. Men and women, husbands and wives, children and grandchildren can participate. Perhaps you have no idea where to start. Get with your pastor or other leaders in your congregation and ask. Research other ministries online and find out how they minister to widows and the lonely.
- Start!
As grandparents we should seize every opportunity to teach our grands how to minister to other people. This is just one of many ways. I pray God will lead you, and bless you in creating other ways to teach your grandchildren to desire Christ presence in the lives of others.
Andy Oldham is the founder and co-creator of Christian Grandfather Magazine. He received his B.A. in religious studies and education from Anderson University. He has served as pastor to senior adults, and fills pulpits when needed. Andy taught memoir classes at the local library and after writing his personal memoirs wrote Everlasting Cronies, a story of growing up in rural Louisiana. His column in the Northside Sun Newspaper was well received by his community. A poem, Winters Grace has been honored by the Mississippi Poetry Society. He and his wife, Barbara, have six grandchildren and enjoy retirement in Madison, Mississippi.
Feature Image by Sabine van Erp
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