The Question Every Christian Man Must Answer
In today’s confused culture, being a “good man” has become increasingly difficult to define. But according to the Bible, God’s Word lays out exactly what it means to be good, and it has nothing to do with being nice, successful, or popular.
In this article, I’d like personally and spiritually explore what a good man is according to Scripture, why it matters, and how you can become one, no matter what your past looks like. Sharing my personal testimony, biblical truth, and a proven pathway through the Real Men 300 brotherhood, this is your invitation to finally become the man God created you to be.
Let me start by asking you a question I wrestled with for years as a Christian man: “Are you a good man?”
Now before you answer too quickly, I want you to really think about it. Because I’m not talking about being nice, respectful, or successful. I’m not even talking about being a good employee, churchgoer, or provider. I’m asking, Are you good in God’s eyes?
For most of my life, I wasn’t. And what made it worse? I didn’t even know what being good really meant. I thought I did. I thought it meant staying out of trouble, going to church, reading my Bible, and not cheating on my taxes. But when I hit rock bottom, after the broken marriage, the lost job, the depression, the addiction, and the shame, I realized I had confused “being a good man” with “looking like a good man.”
It wasn’t until I was re-introduced to Jesus Christ (thank you John) in my brokenness and started walking with other godly men in honest brotherhood, that I learned what the Bible says about what it really means to be good. And brother, it changed my life. Let me show you how it can change yours.
What Is a Good Man According to the Bible?
What a Good Man is NOT
Before we can understand what a good man is, we have to deconstruct what the world says he is. Our culture says a good man is:
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Strong (but never weak)
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Rich (or at least comfortable)
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Smart (but not too spiritual)
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Respected (but not too righteous)
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Nice (but not too needy)
But God’s Word paints a very different picture.
Listen to this: “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” – Micah 6:8 (ESV)
God doesn’t define a good man by status, success, or swagger; He defines him by justice, mercy, and humility. And if we’re honest, many of us have traded God’s definition of goodness for the world’s applause. But here’s the truth: You can be a “good man” in the world and still be far from God. And when you try to lead your wife, raise your children, or fight temptation from that place, you’re fighting a battle without a weapon.
Biblical Characteristics of a Godly Man
What Does God Require of a Good Man?
The Bible is full of examples of what a good man looks like. Here are a few defining traits:
1. A Good Man Fears the Lord
“Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in his commandments!” – Psalm 112:1. This isn’t about being afraid of God. It’s about revering Him, trusting Him, and living under His authority. A good man knows he’s not the ultimate authority in his home or life; God is.
2. A Good Man Walks in Integrity
“The righteous who walks in his integrity—blessed are his children after him!” – Proverbs 20:7. A good man tells the truth, even when it costs him. He doesn’t pretend to be one man in public and another in private. He repents when he falls and doesn’t hide behind excuses.
3. A Good Man Loves Sacrificially
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” – Ephesians 5:25. This one hit me hard. Being a good man isn’t about dominating your household; it’s about dying to yourself for the good of your family. Jesus didn’t just teach sacrifice; He lived it, and so must we.
4. A Good Man Guards His Heart and Eyes
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” – Proverbs 4:23. Whether it’s lust, pride, or anger, a good man protects his heart because he knows what’s at stake.
What Makes a Man Good in God’s Eyes?
Why It Matters (Especially Today)
Let’s be real. Good men are becoming an endangered species. Fathers are absent. Marriages are collapsing. Porn is normal. Faith is mocked. Masculinity is confused. And our wives and children are paying the price. That’s why being a good man isn’t a luxury or a preference. It’s a calling. It’s a battle. It’s a necessity.
But here’s the good news: You don’t have to be perfect to be good. You just have to be surrendered. God doesn’t use perfect people. He uses broken, humbled, teachable ones. Men who fall to their knees, not just on Sunday, but in the secret place, in the middle of the night, in the face of temptation, in the presence of their children. You don’t become a good man by trying harder; you become one by trusting deeper in the grace of Christ.
How to Be a Good Man According to Scripture
How the Real Men 300 Brotherhood Can Help
When I started Real Men Connect, it was never about building a brand. It was about building better men, starting with me. Because I realized something: You can’t become the man God called you to be by yourself.
The Real Men 300 is a private, Christian brotherhood of men committed to:
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pursuing Christ daily
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loving their wives faithfully
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leading their families fearlessly
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serving others humbly
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and living out their calling courageously
Through our 5-step proven discipleship framework, we walk men step-by-step through what it looks like to be a good, godly man in the real world. No fluff. No judgment. Just truth, training, and brotherhood. And guess what? We don’t care where you start; we just care that you don’t stay stuck.
Traits of a Godly Man in the Bible
If you’ve ever felt like:
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“I don’t know how to lead my family spiritually.”
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“I’m tired of fighting temptation alone.”
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“I’m a good man, but I want to be God’s man.”
Then Real Men 300 was created for you.
How to Become a Godly Man Today
So, let me leave you with this: Being a good man is not about your past; it’s not about your personality; and it’s not about your performance. It’s about your posture before God.
“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.” – Psalm 37:23 (KJV)
God has already ordered your steps; He just needs your yes. So, what does a good man do next? He humbles himself. He seeks God. He walks with other godly men. He takes the first step.
Dr. Joe Martin is the president and founder of Real Men Connect. A faith-based non-profit organization that helps Christian men in crisis when what matters most: faith, family, finance, leadership, and legacy. To find out more, visit Real Men Connect today.
Image by Scripture-Images
I’m a god fearing Single woman God’s sending me a powerful God fearing Man and I would like to know how to be ready for him I long for love and guidance ❤️ I’m nothing without my heavenly father I just need more guidance in my life in retired and I want to be married but these men out here are no good I’m not searching I’m curious and I’m being still can you help me get into a real woman connection please thank you
Hi Kim! Thank you for your comment. Let me see if I can find the right person for you to connect with. Praise God that you trust your life in Him. I know that He is present in your life, and He will make the way possible in HIs timing. I have prayed for you and will continue to do so. God Bless!
Correct, this reminds me of my early days in Church or in School when I was about 6 or 5 years old. Even though the word Good was never defined to me, I could learn by intuition that Good means “Not evil”, Significant (or Helpful), Long-lasting (that may also mean Eternal)……..
I have boundless conviction that It was the Lord communicating . Thanks for sharing.
Your Friend -His Servant,
Isaac Otieno
Looking to God to show me and walk with him. I am going through separation from my wife. God has been calling out to me.
Good morning, Matt. Thank you for reading our article and for commenting. Joe Martin, who wrote the article is here to help men work through issues we have in life, such as separation. Please contact him through his website at, https://www.realmenconnect.com/. He offers a free breakthrough call where he will work with you. He has helped hundreds of men answer God’s calling and work through things, like separation and other things that men encounter in their spiritual walk.
God Bless you brother!